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For many women, their hair is one of the most expressive and honest extensions of themselves. Do you want to be edgy? Or to try something new, bold, and sexy? A short hairstyle may be right for you. A shorter style may be easier to manage and allow you to explore yourself in a new way, but you may be hesitant. For me, one traumatic hair salon experiment prevented me from trying something new for a decade. In that time, I learned that you should never fear trying something new, especially if you have curly hair.

I wanted to stand out and be different without being too different. But, when I went to the hairdresser and told her to chop it off for the first time since first grade, I forgot to tell her “don’t make it look like I came straight out of a 1980’s Rom-Com.” The end result was a hideously short haircut that resembled a triangle, and coincidentally the same hairstyle of a well-meaning but very much disliked math teacher at my school. By the end of seventh grade, I vowed that I would never have a short hairstyle ever again, no matter how good the women looked in the magazines.

Eventually, I realized that terrible haircuts shouldn’t define how you feel about shorter styles. After talking to several women in my family, I discovered that we have all had that one horrible cut that made us fear the worst when going to the hair salon. They told me that in the end, they learned to overcome their fear by taking the first step toward short hair.

I noticed that the first time I chopped off my hair, I was dealing with a distractible hairdresser who spent half her time on the phone. That’s when I found a new hairdresser, who knew how to cut curly hair and took the time to get to know my needs and my hair. The end result was a new style, a magical and wonderful short hairdo that fit my needs and lifestyle and looks good on me.

It is always scary to take a plunge into the unknown, especially with something as personal as hair. Everyone has their own story of trauma, whether it was an accidental mullet at the age of three, a perm gone wrong, or a short hairstyle that resembles a triangle. But don’t let anything stop you from trying something new and exciting. Take chances, and make mistakes. Go and find that perfect and short hairstyle that helps you to define a new you.